Friday, January 21, 2011

The Kindness Ball.....

The other evening, a disagreement between Jeremiah and Annalise quickly escalated. They were both tired, and screaming at each other, both lost in their own feelings and not able to hear each other at all.

I could see that the situation was about to truly get ugly if I didn't do something - but it had to be the right something. There happened to be a soft rubbery ball on the floor by my foot. Inspiration struck, and I scooped it up, tossing it in the air until I had both children's attention. And then I said something nice about each of them, and tossed the ball to Annalise. "You've got the Kindness Ball," I told her. "Do you want to say some nice things?"

We all took a turn, and the idea was instantly adopted. We don't remember every time there's hurt feelings, but it's becoming more natural to get to the place where we can think of something nice and lovable about each other - which seems, very quickly, to defuse the angry feelings and make finding an agreeable balance easier.

When we think nice things about others, it makes it easier to want to be nicer to them. Life gets just that much sweeter.

There's been some hurt among people I know or know of, just lately. Likely, when things settle out, everyone involved may see where they might have made a different, kinder choice. But, just now, the feelings are deep and raw, and that's what seems to have spread out in ripples today (I say seems, because I came to the computer well after dark).

So I am tossing out my Kindness Ball again. I plan on randomly posting some honest compliments on the walls of my friends, over the next weeks and months. If you want to catch the ball, it's virtual......so feel free to spread some kindness around facebook, and lets get those ripples of goodness rolling across the Internet sea......


8 comments:

Jessica said...

I love the idea, and kindness should hopefully breed kindness...i also think that some kind of kindness stick/ball/something might be a good idea here in times of tiredness and stress!

De said...

Awesome! I love it - I'm starting the kindness ball here at home *and* online! :~) Thanks for sharing!

Unschoolers Rock the Campground said...

You really do rock, Shannon. So much.

Shan Jeniah Burton said...

Awww, shucks, Jean. *digs toe in carpet* Coming from a rockin' expert like you, that means a lot! =)

Stephanie said...

AHA!
Very good idea :)
You are awesome :)

~Maria~ said...

What a great idea! Nate and I were urged to start giving each other little love notes, and it has had a similar effect on our relationship.

Stephanie said...

My goodness those are some sweet-looking babies. :) (Truly.)

I love this post. I love this idea! The next time we're having a problem, hopefully I'll remember this, and either implement the Kindness Ball, or some other similar tool that feels right.
Thanks so much for sharing your idea with us... and thanks so much for spreading some love and kindness around!

Shan Jeniah Burton said...

Thank you! They are enchantin' tog. I might be slightly biased, but that's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

I often think I should have time to linger over the writing, and post pictures, but there isn't a lot of time for that much fussing, right now.

I'm making a goal to post more this year, and focus on substance over form.

Thank you for your kind words and wisdom, too! =)